Physical punishment of a child; pros and cons.
Physical punishment of a child; what are they? Is it right or wrong? Can parents do the same thing? Do they have any advantages or disadvantages to physical punishment?
Before discussing the possible pros and cons of physical punishment, let’s have a look at some of the ways we parents use discipline. Some parents spank their children; others slap them. Some parents scream and/or scream at their children. Some parents send their children to daycare. The idea here is to teach the child that behaving badly will not get them what they want – or what they don’t want.
This may work for a short time; maybe a week or so. However, when a child starts to behave badly again, he/she will always find ways to get what they want – no matter how they get it. And your child will become a worse person because of all the suffering they have had to go through. So you are still doing something wrong.
Furthermore, when a child does bad things, parents who resort to physical punishment may feel guilty deep in their soul. How can you feel guilty about hurting someone else’s child? Do you see yourself as an evil person? Do you think you can take any pride in your actions?
A better alternative to physical punishment is to explain to your child why he did what he did. I’m sure most parents would agree that this is much better than using physical punishment. For example: “The rules said that if you were going to throw a fit, you had to run to the nearest exit. If you didn’t obey our rule, then you would get beaten.”
A child should understand why his actions have consequences. He should also be given an alternative action that will make him happy. You don’t have to come up with a complicated punishment system. Just tell him to wait until his turn for playing, and remind him about the rule once in a while to make sure that he continues to abide by it.
Finally, always take into account the age of your child. It is not advisable to be too harsh on a small child. Smaller children can take longer to master than adult children, so physical punishment can backfire against you more often than not. If your child gets annoyed with you, he might develop even more negative habits such as him thinking that it is his parents who are punishing him, and he might be led to be even sneakier.
Sometimes, you might find yourself getting annoyed with your child. You just want to scold him, but you don’t know what to say. Don’t worry; there are many things that you can do to calm down your child. Tell him that he is simply being picky on the things that he likes and wants to keep. Let him realize that his actions are not acceptable.
Take time to play with your child. Try to build a healthy relationship between you two. Show him that you respect his individuality. Show him that you are not to be manipulated or bullied. These are things that can help him eventually develop respect for other people, and eventually his own self-confidence.
Try to establish some routine. Set a time schedule that he will have to follow. Make sure that it is not just your time that he has to look at, either. This way, you both will have a sense of belonging and an identity separate from each other.
Always show your child the proper way to express anger or frustration. Don’t let him do whatever he feels like doing. If he does something wrong, tell him “no” in a firm voice and make sure that you give him a time out. Do this a few times before he does something else again. This will show him that he really cannot do that thing, and he will probably understand why after he realizes how much time he has been given to do it.
Physical punishment has its place. If you feel that your child is misbehaving badly, then you will most likely want to get him or her into a formal punishment routine. Doing so will teach your child proper behavior more easily, and you will be able to get him or her to listen better to you.